Girl dating a guy 4 years younger

Content
  • Older Women Dating Younger Men: Doomed from the Start or Happily Ever After in Cougarville?
  • Here Are The 10 Most Important Rules Of Dating Younger Women
  • ‘I Dated A Much-Younger Man—Here’s What It Was Like’
  • Things That Happen When Your Boyfriend’s Younger Than You
  • 11 Reasons to Date a Younger Guy
  • 11 Reasons to Date a Younger Guy
  • Dating While Weird: In Defense of the Younger Man
  • Why aren’t more women open to dating younger men?
  • Things To Consider Before Dating A Younger Woman
  • 5 Tips For Dating Younger Men

If you’re ready to accept that age is just a number, then your pool of eligible bachelors just got a hell of a lot bigger—and might include some much younger dudes. Plus, all the cool kids are dating younger these days. Curious what it’s like to get serious with someone lacking as much life experience as you? We asked real women to spill all the details of dating a more youthful dude. I was 36 and he was

Older Women Dating Younger Men: Doomed from the Start or Happily Ever After in Cougarville?

When I met my boyfriend Jesse, I was 28 and he was 24 — not too much of a dating age difference in the grand scheme of things, but to hear some of my friends at the time tell it, you’d think we were Harold and Maude — or at the very least, Ashton and Demi. In the early days of our relationship, I got a lot of a lot of exasperated eyerolls, “you go, girl”s, and questions about whether I was technically old enough to be a cougar. I also had a lot of friends who couldn’t believe how dumb I was — didn’t I remember how difficult it was to get a guy to commit at age 24?[rs_table_products tableName=”Best Dating Websites”]

Why would I want to go through that again? But the experience has made me think about how women are discouraged from dating younger men — especially women in their twenties. Although the idea of a “cougar ” who dates much younger men has a certain cultural cachet, being a woman in your twenties who simply chooses a partner who’s a bit younger is often viewed as weird, desperate, or deluded — basically, anything besides what it is, which is totally normal.

People have a much easier time, it seems, getting on board with the idea of a woman taking a younger partner for purely sexual reasons than they do with the idea of a woman in a serious relationship with a younger partner. So if you’re thinking about getting together with someone younger , don’t listen to anyone who uses words like “cougar,” “cradle robber,” or “Samantha Jones;” instead, consider the five points below.

In your twenties, especially in the years immediately after college, an age difference of just a year or two can make you feel like you’re a world apart from someone. Which makes sense — in the course of 24 months, I transformed from a college senior who’d never lived on my own and subsisted primarily on bagels stolen from the school cafeteria to a financially independent adult who worked a serious job and subsisted primarily on bagels stolen from work.

I felt like I was racking up new life milestones every day, and couldn’t imagine relating to anyone younger than me — and so I became fixated on dating older guys, because I thought it was the only way I could find someone who would be mature enough to make me happy. But this kind of thinking conflates practical responsibility with emotional maturity — which isn’t really accurate. We might think that certain concrete markers of adulthood — a prestigious job; a working knowledge of personal finance; properly assembled Ikea furniture —signify a related degree of emotional maturity.

And sometimes, they do; sometimes someone who is older really is more emotionally intelligent. But often, there is no correlation. Hell, we’ve even developed a terminology to describe people who look like adults on the outside, but are basically middle schoolers on the inside — that’d be that scourge of the dating world, the ” man-child ” or “woman-child. In my own mid-twenties, I dated a year-old, expecting to find someone ready to get serious sheerly based on his age and professional accomplishments; instead, I found an immature trainwreck who made rude comments about my weight and cheated on me basically every time I was out of earshot.

Lots of women who’ve dated around have similar stories that prove that there’s no concrete relationship between being older and actually acting like an adult. In our culture, dating an older partner is often seen as a status symbol for younger women — we’re often told that older partners will be more financially and emotionally stable, which is why being courted by an older partner is often seen as a compliment, a confirmation that you, indeed, have your act together and are desirable.

This is probably why heterosexual women’s age preferences in partners tend to skew their own ages of higher while heterosexual men’s tend to skew younger. God knows that’s what I felt, while dating the above-noted older dude — I felt like his desire for me marked me as more mature and interesting than my peers. To date someone younger is to consciously reject a lot of this. For this reason, being a woman with a younger partner is often viewed in a negative light.

You’re supposedly an immature doofus who can’t attract partners your own age, or maybe a delusional narcissist who can’t cope with aging I’ve heard both! Again, all these ideas are based on stereotypes — primarily, that youth is one of the only valuable traits a woman possesses when dating, and that to take a pass on using it as a bargaining chip to find a more desirable mate is insane. Does that sound terrible?

If so, good! We can fight this totally gross line of thinking by agreeing to view younger people that we have chemistry as real possible partners — and by not constantly “joking” about any woman we know who happens to have a younger partner. But, of course, if calling yourself a “cougar” gets your rocks off, then more power to you, my friend.

There’s another myth out there that dating young people means that you’ll never get serious — that dating a younger guy or girl means that you’re signing on for a relationship purgatory full of half-assed plans, a lack of emotional commitment, and being introduced as “this girl I’m kinda hanging out with” at parties. Again, this is generalizing that conflates age with a specific set of romantic values — plenty of people of all ages aren’t interested in serious relationships, and plenty of people of all ages are interested in serious relationships, too.

Ludwig isn’t necessarily describing a younger guy; instead, she’s describing a guy who isn’t interested in a serious relationship, a kind of dude who comes in all ages. In my own anecdotal experience, I’ve found no correlation between age and interest in a serious relationship. One of my closest friends recently married a guy five years her junior, after years of dating commitmentphobic dudes her own age and older; and Jesse was more open and interested in pursuing something serious with me than anyone I’d ever dated, despite being an age when he was supposed to be more interested in “playing the field.

Jesse wasn’t my first dip into the younger dude pool — we connected after I’d had a handful of casual things with guys four or five years younger than me. I’d just gotten out of a long-ish relationship with a guy who was fixated on achieving “appropriate life milestones ” — marriage, kids, stable jobs — and the experience made me realize that I wasn’t on the same page about that kind of thing as a lot of people my own age.

At 28, I was only just beginning to explore my true desires for my career and life — which made me have a lot more in common with a recent college grad than someone who’d had almost a decade since graduation to figure out what they wanted. Sometimes, certain experiences or personality quirks make us have more in common with people younger or older than us — and not giving those people a shot romantically because they’re not the same exact age as you is nuts.

The line of thinking that all younger guys are total scrubs dances around the fact that all older guys were once younger guys — and that younger guys will soon be older guys. Our personalities remain more consistent through the years, but the window dressing of maturity tends to change pretty darn quick — which is how, despite having the same age gap, my once “scandalously young” partner is now seen as pretty age appropriate for me.

Sure, if you date someone younger than you, you may get to help them figure out some basic life admin stuff for a while — but it won’t be a pure “teacher-student”-type relationship, not just because younger people still have plenty to teach us, but also because people figure that stuff out relatively quickly. The window of time when I was helping Jesse learn about credit reports and negotiating a salary was brief, while he continues to teach me new things about love and commitment every day I know, barf.

To act like youth is an eternal state — that a person who is currently 23 and not totally sure about how to pick a good bottle of wine or operate their dishwasher, will exist in that state forever — is actively denying the facts of our own lives. We’re all aging, and life is too damned short to not date someone who’s younger than you just because society has psyched you out about it. Want more of Bustle’s Sex and Relationships coverage?

Check out our new podcast, I Want It That Way , which delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship, and find more on our Soundcloud page. By Gabrielle Moss.

5 Reasons Women Shouldn’t Be Afraid Of Dating Younger Men Of course, I didn’t “go through that again,” and five years into our relationship, . 4. You Don’t Always Have More In Common With People Your Own Age. In those ages 4 years older/younger doesn’t make much difference. Not for another decade or so honestly, I’m not dating a high schooler.

When I met my boyfriend Jesse, I was 28 and he was 24 — not too much of a dating age difference in the grand scheme of things, but to hear some of my friends at the time tell it, you’d think we were Harold and Maude — or at the very least, Ashton and Demi. In the early days of our relationship, I got a lot of a lot of exasperated eyerolls, “you go, girl”s, and questions about whether I was technically old enough to be a cougar. I also had a lot of friends who couldn’t believe how dumb I was — didn’t I remember how difficult it was to get a guy to commit at age 24? Why would I want to go through that again? But the experience has made me think about how women are discouraged from dating younger men — especially women in their twenties.

If you’re thinking about dating a younger man, congratulations.

There are a few things at play here. And not for the reasons you may think.

‘I Dated A Much-Younger Man—Here’s What It Was Like’

Some forums can only be seen by registered members. As long as my husband wouldn’t mind, sure! Originally Posted by KMG1. And let’s just say he’s very mature and meets everything else on your list. In the Pearl of the Purchase, Ky.

Things That Happen When Your Boyfriend’s Younger Than You

I just turned 35 and my GF is 28, so 7 yrs difference. But girl is 20 and you’re Sex a few times only and then keep on rollin I’ve gone a decade younger and older before for that. By the time I was 25 I would not date college girls. King Kong 1, I dated someone whose daughter’s only two years younger than me. I found it quite funny when he pressed me to commit to the ‘relationship’. I need a younger girl. I never thought of it that way, but it.

I have always dated older men. I thought it was the only way to go.

Feb 27 02 – i’m absolutely in love wit my boyfriend list would you may 25 years younger men that, baby-sitting him. Because you like pairing up by kevonstagewomen dating a girl dating a comment below me but, because your partner. Maybe you up a guy let’s say in college freshman?

11 Reasons to Date a Younger Guy

The first guy I properly dated was exactly a year younger than me we shared the same birthday, I thought it was meant to be and the last guy I dated was four years younger than me. I dabble in dating apps wassup, Bumble? Some of these older guys. You could smell the desperation through the phone — it was like they had their mum breathing down their necks asking for grandkids. I might be 31 but marriage, babies and mortgages are not on my radar. Nikki, 33 agrees: Plus, research says that women hit their sexual prime later than men, so you may well be doing yourself a favour going younger. And it ends up not working. Woman explains how her children taught her to finally accept and love her body. Woman divorced husband after he ignored her phone messages.

11 Reasons to Date a Younger Guy

There are the perks, such as his optimism, the simplicity of the relationship and the excitement he has for pretty much anything. It’s nice to be reminded to have fun every once a while, especially when it’s with someone I care so much about. Whether this be the general stereotype of a woman or specific to an older woman, men can sometimes treat us like their mothers. To be honest, I iron things with my hair straightener and only do laundry when I run out of underwear. What makes my boyfriend think I will be better about his? I really don’t understand why younger guys are fixated on who their girlfriends dated four years ago, or why they would even want to hear about them. They’re exes for a reason.

Dating While Weird: In Defense of the Younger Man

But the heart wants what the heart wants, and at some point in your life, you might find yourself with a partner who is significantly older or younger than you. Nothing is guaranteed obviously, and a relationship is more about compatibility than a birthday. But as long as you can be open about your issues with the relationship, it should all end happily ever after maybe. But depending on your own social habits, hearing people say or worse, hearing that they told someone else something negative about your relationship can wear a person down. Find your inner Madonna and come up with a good comeback to use on the fly with rude people and ways to stay secure in your new fling.

Why aren’t more women open to dating younger men?

He has more energy — and his influence might make you healthier and more productive. Maybe you want to sleep in until 2 p. He’s less cynical. Unless he’s had an especially soul-crushing unpaid internship, he’s probably got some beautiful illusions about his promising place in the workforce. And we both know you can use some positivity in your life. He’s eager to please sexually. Not only has he got the energy thing on his side, but it’s unlikely that he’ll be a selfish lover.

Things To Consider Before Dating A Younger Woman

Multiple studies suggest the key to a long and prosperous life is not eating beets and drinking sad green juices all the time, but rather something much more enjoyable — dating younger women. It’s for your health, after all. Hold onto your dicks, my dudes. One of the woes younger women tend to deal with when it comes to dating are men playing games with them. You also need romance and intellectual passion to keep the spark alive. Depending on your age I’m looking for a certain level of maturity, someone I can learn from, someone looking to have a long-term relationship, and someone that knows who he is.

5 Tips For Dating Younger Men

People who have been in relationships with someone who was more than a few years older or younger than they are will probably tell you that, while age is technically just a number, sometimes it says a lot about someone and their life circumstances. And while relationships with age gaps can and certainly do succeed it’s important to keep your eyes peeled for red flags when dating someone younger during the early stages of seeing this person. At this point, it should go without saying that, while someone’s age may imply something about their level of maturity, at the end of the day, maturity and age can be at shocking odds with one another. As someone who has been dating people who were over 30 since the beginning of my 20s, I can confidently say that I have come in contact with countless grown men with the same maturity level as my year-old nephew. So age shouldn’t necessarily be a deciding factor unless you find that age-related weirdness keeps becoming a “thing. However, you should still keep an eye out some things that signal age might be more than just a number.

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